The Culchie Control Platform

first published
24 Jul 2002
~ republished 24 Jul 2013

Culchie is Dublin slang for people who come from the country. In practice, it is used to refer to everybody who lives outside Dublin, with the exception of Ulster, where Nordies is the preferred form. Ireland's population is very skewed towards Dublin - almost half the population live in or around the capital and the next biggest town on the island (Belfast) is probably less than a quarter of the size. Hence there is a big divide between Dublin and the rest.

This video was produced by Luke MacManus for a show called Sampler on Ireland's national TV network, RTE, in 2002.  I came up with the concept and co-wrote the script with Luke and did about half of the camera-work.  Luke did all of the dog-work, including persuading a few of RTE's highest profile presenters to take part.  The concept was intended as a satire of anti-immigration groups, notably the Irish Immigration Control Platform.  Luke also managed to squeeze in a decent amount of satire of Irish Republicanism: the various aspects of the anti-culchie movement's mythology are close parallels of some of the important aspects of Irish Republicanism. Luke did a good job on putting it all together, but what really makes the sketch is the performance of Leon (as Mick Bhamjee). Such great deadpan delivery, I always knew that man was a good spoofer, he should have worked that asset and gone to Hollywood on it.

I used to do a decent amount of video work (mostly news footage gathering / protest filming / etc) until my nice camera was stolen in 2005 - a very weird break in where the only thing taken was the camera and lots of other valuable stuff was ignored. I have my suspicions as to who the culprits were. Sadly, I haven't been able to afford a replacement since!

Comments (6)

Eoghan Ryan

also as a member of the lynching party no?

chekov's picture

I filmed that bit. I did film a cameo appearance but it got left on the cutting room floor :-(


I really needed a laugh today - thanks!

Anonymous clarify...I do not condone the actions of the Drumcondra against redneck terror group :-)


Brilliant, haven't seen this before.


Just catching up on your blog/website after a Summer's break... this is hysterical - cheers